South Africa

South Africa - So full of controversy and beauty, it is no wonder people want to visit and tourism is so big. The country has everything that someone traveling to another country could want: its own wildlife, its own wine, and its own coffee. I wish I could go there for all of the above, but I am going with a few friends on a safari.

I get the wildlife.

Which isn't so bad when you understand just how much I love elephants. I had never seen an elephant in person. When I got married, my husband surprised me with circus tickets. I'd never been to the circus, so I was really excited.

(What kind of childhood did I have that I didn't go to the circus???)

I was excited about the clowns, though I find them creepy up close. From a distance, they can be mildly humourous. This one had a dog, and the dog was really funny. I saw acrobatics, I saw contortionists, I saw beautiful ladies and muscular men and then finally, I saw the elephants.

My fascination with elephants started in the 3rd grade. It was my first trip ever to a library. I didn't even know such a thing existed. But there we were, in amongst the stacks. Except I towered over the stacks for 3rd grade readers. I wanted to be with the books on shelves that were taller than me. So I wandered away from my group and walked towards the books that had more words than pictures.

I didn't know what I was doing or how to tell if one book was better than another so I decided I would read whatever I found interesting. Yes, I was judging books by their covers and ended up picking out three books. One book had the most beautiful prints of knights in armour, one book was a book of Native American mythology, and the other book had the most beautifully painted men and women and these men and women rode elephants. I devoured the stories and as the years progressed, I forgot what I read, but I never forgot the image of the people on elephants and how majestic and huge the animals were, but how gentle and kind they seemed. How could I tell?

It was in the elephant's eyes.

Of course, it wasn't until I was in college, reading a book of verse that seemed vaguely familiar, that I connected one of my first read books to the actual words. The Bhagavad Gita will always hold a special place in my heart.

So, the circus elephant has come out and at first I am excited. But I watch how tired the elephant looks as it walks around, lead by his trainer. I see the elephant's eyes and it looks as if it has finally given up hope. Suddenly, I am sad for the elephant, ashamed that we tolerate this treatment for our entertainment, and angry that there is nothing I can do. My husband, who had hoped to be my knight in shining armour for bringing me to see the elephants is now upset because I'm upset.

This is not an elephant, but someone's very large animal, it's elephant soul trained out of it.

But I relish the little things because though this elephant was beaten down, it was not broken. It did its tricks, but with such a mean spirit, it made me laugh. "You did your mean laugh. What's happening?" my husband asked. I pointed out the things I imagined showed that the elephant was simply biding its time until the right time came. We laughed as the elephant refused to stand on the ball, or when it threw the ball, threw it just a little too far. The impatience of the trainer was evident and we knew that the elephant was going to pay for it later on that day.

At least, that's what we imagined.

So when I get to Africa, I want to see elephants. Herds of them. And baby ones too. Because I want to see what an elephant looks like when it has its soul.